I'm drinking my wine now, for I don't want to be irresponsible and mix it with nighttime cold medicine.
Ticked off today's quotidian To-Do List was calling my mobile phone company and throwing myself on their mercy ... my father suddenly became sick and died mid-October ... and there was a week when I was away in NH and honestly, the last thing on my mind was my phone plan (I normally make or receive one call a year). So, my bill was triple what it normally is and my pockets are not only empty, they've holes. I bring to you, in one act, my conversation with, let's call them S-Mobile:
Extremeley Effete S-Mobile Representative: Good afternoon! Welcome to S-Mobile -- what may I help you with today?
Me: Hi, yes, I was hoping you could help me with my latest bill.
EES-MR: Okay, I'm pulling up your account. First, what is your name, please?
Me: Okay that didn't really happen.
EES-MR: No, it didn't. Please tell me your password.
Me: Could I have a hint, please?
EES-MR: I'm sorry, I cannot give you a "hint."
Me: What? Seriously? Is it my mother's maiden name, my father's middle name, my childhood pet, age of first menses, location of my birth, favorite mole location?
EES-MR: I'm sorry! I cannot tell you!
Me: But, but, but... There are a squillion passwords and they tell us to never use the same! You have to give me a hint -- is it a name, location, number?
Damage done, though.
He didn't fully refund or forgive the overcharges, although he did take $30+ off. I resignedly thanked him and told him I appreciated all his help.
Moral: Plan family emergencies better and demand a prompt for passwords.